As You Are
by misgivings
Summary: In another life, they lived happily ever after. Together.


**i.**

In another life, Chase doesn't kill a patient, regardless of the patient's role in genocide.

Instead, Dibala dies because of unforeseen complications in one life, and is gunned down as soon as he sets foot outside the hospital in another. It's justice in every way and Chase doesn't even blink an eye.

Cameron doesn't judge him.

**ii.**

In another life, Dibala's blood is still on Chase's hands, but the fact remains that they are married; that Allison had vowed to stay by Robert's side through thick and thin, in sickness and in health.

She stays.

Even when the guilt eats away at him, she stays.

Even when all she wants to do is run away, she stays.

She is an everlasting presence by his side, steady and reassuring.

Eventually, the desire to flee fades, closely followed by the guilt.

**iii.**

In another life, prior to their divorce, they are brought together by less than stellar circumstances.

"Cameron," says Foreman. "Chase is sick." Cameron doesn't even have a chance to respond before Foreman is urging her to come back to New Jersey. "Please," he begs, when she feels just-barely convinced. She books the first flight to Princeton.

When Chase wakes the following morning and sees her reading a book in the bedside chair, a ghost of a smile appears on his face. "I don't know if I'm surprised or not surprised at all," he tells her, voice honest and small. "Who called you?"

"Foreman," she replies, setting the book down and meeting his eyes for the first time in months. "You never signed the divorce papers," she adds as an after thought.

"We never really talked about our marriage," he counters. "You packed your bags and left before we really could."

Allison is suddenly more aware than ever how unresolved they left things. (_How _you_ left things_, a voice in her mind accuses.) While she regrets fleeing with no real explanation, it was for her own sake, and the sake of her sanity. Abruptly, a war of emotions is triggered deep within her, leaving her unsure of what to do.

"I know it may not mean much," she says, hesitantly resting her hand on his, "but I missed you." Struggling to find the right words, she pauses. "I missed the way you held me when we took those dance classes for our wedding. I missed so many things about you and _us_. God, Chase, walking away wasn't easy. It wasn't. Don't think for a second that it was. I couldn't stay, and I know that's probably stupidly selfish, but if you'd begged me to stay, it would've been selfish, too. The truth was too much for me. The _guilt_ was too much for me."

She fails to realize she is crying until a thumb is brushing a stray tear away. The gesture is intimate, and the fact startles Allison, forcing her to suck in a deep breath. "I missed you, too," he says. "_Miss_ you, really. I miss the way you would wrap your arm around me in bed without even realizing it. I miss seeing you first thing in the morning and last thing at night. I miss _you_, Allison."

It's impulsive and risky, but it's all Cameron needs to hear before she is kissing Chase, buried feelings resurfacing all at once.

"Come home," Chase murmurs when they pull away for air. He sounds so damn vulnerable and sincere, it brings Allison back to when he had chased after her years ago—even after she'd used him, he had still pursued her.

Allowing her forehead to rest on his, she closes her eyes. "I am home, Robert," she tells him. "I'm not going anywhere."

Three months later, when he is finally cancer free, she stays true to her word.

**iv.**

In another life, Allison Cameron is the one with blood on her hands.

Foreman confronts her, but he doesn't question the role she plays in Dibala's death. No, he mentions _Chase_, which is enough to push Cameron over the edge. "He didn't do it," she says fiercely. Her words are like daggers, matched with an equally piercing gaze.

The other man is still reeling from the information when Chase walks in, eyes tired and body tense. Instantly, Cameron knows that Chase is more than aware of what's transpired in the past few days. His eyes meet hers and there is a silent promise in them, as if he is saying, _I love you and that hasn't changed_, without actually saying the words.

"All the lives we've saved," Chase says to no one in particular. "They would mean next to nothing if we allowed that man another chance to kill. Bloody hell, Foreman, he was planning genocide."

"He was our _patient_," Foreman seethes.

"He was a _murderer_," says Cameron. "Now so am I."

"Allison—"

"Not if we can help it."

Chase's head snaps up almost at the same time Cameron's does.

Foreman still looks angry, but there is a reluctant understanding in his eyes that puts the spouses at ease. "I can't believe I'm saying this," he tells them, "but we have to get rid of any real evidence." Then, he adds, "We should also probably tell House."

Unable to help himself, Chase scoffs. "The man was practically encouraging us to commit first degree murder, and you're telling me you don't think he already knows? He's a diabolical genius who's somehow mastered the art of reading people as screwed up as us."

True to his persona and Chase's prediction, House studies each of them with something akin to amusement before kicking his feet up onto the table and saying, "Finally. Something exciting around here. I've always wanted to be a part of a homicide pact."

"Do you have to be such a bastard about this?" Foreman asks, glaring.

House just laughs. "My, my. I think the ducklings are all finally black swans."

(Allison Cameron is a murderer here, but Robert Chase is easily forgiving. "I would have done it myself if you hadn't," is his only explanation, but it's enough to appease Allison. Together, they cope.)

**v.**

In another life, they have a scandalous affair.

Allison is married and Robert is engaged. More importantly, Robert is a trusted colleague of Allison's husband, and Allison is a close friend of Robert's fiancée. It is betrayal and passion and romance all packed into one—the result of an unhappy marriage and an unsure future.

"This is wrong," she tries telling him one night, before melting into Robert's touch.

"If this is wrong," he responds, "I don't ever want to be right."

Allison is _married_ and Robert is _engaged_, but ironically enough, their partners aren't faithful, either.

Greg signs the divorce papers willingly and Remy agrees to call off the engagement.

(They beat the odds and end up together.)

**vi.**

In another life, they are patients at PPTH—too young to be facing the prospect of death.

They are ten years old and Robert wants to show Allison the world.

They are ten years old and dying and Allison just wants to kiss Robert.

Robert can't show her the world from their hospital beds, so he shares stories of Australia.

When he is finished, Allison wants to plant a wet one on him. He is the sweetest boy she's ever met, inside the hospital or otherwise, and she thinks this is what her mother meant when she explained to her what love was. Too tired to move, though, she demands a kiss from the boy instead.

By her bedside, Robert frowns, wondering. "Why do you want me to kiss you?"

"Don't be stupid, Robbie. I like you."

"But why, Allie? I'm not handsome like the other boys," he insists.

Something stirs in her when his eyes shine with an emotion she recognizes all too well. "I'm not pretty like the other girls," Allison had told her mother after she'd lost all of her hair. "Why can't I just be pretty like the other girls, mama?"

"I like you as you are," she murmurs.

The surprise is evident on Robert's face when he meets her eyes again, but this time, he is beaming at her. He leans forward, eyes twinkling with youthful jubilation. _Yes_, Allison thinks when he finally kisses her, _this must be love_.

Now, they are fifteen years old and Robert wants to show Allison the universe.

They are fifteen years old—alive and well—and Allison still wants to kiss Robert.

Robert can't show her the universe from where they're gazing at stars, but as he recalls what he knows about the sun and the stars and the moon, Allison thinks it's more than okay.

When he's finished, Allison pulls Robert in for a kiss and tells him as much.

(Everyone tells her there are no fairy tales in real life, but Allison begs to differ.)

**vii.**

In another life, they meet as teenagers.

They are both in college and Allison is smitten with the soft spoken foreigner whose very smile had won her over. It is love at first sight, in every sense of the phrase, and they marry as soon as they graduate. Fate leads them to PPTH, eventually, but not to Gregory House.

They are the best doctors in their fields and Robert has never been more grateful for his decision to become a doctor. Medicine introduced him to the love of his life, and everyday, he is reminded of that fact when she smiles at him from across the room or wraps her slender arm around his waist in bed.

When they have a son, Allison is brought back to the moment she had fallen in love with Robert as he tenderly cradles little Rowan in his arms.

When they have a daughter, and familiar eyes are staring up at him from where he is holding their precious baby girl in his arms, Robert is again reminded of just how lucky he is that one seemingly simple decision to pursue what he felt most passionate about brought him all this joy and more.

"She looks so much like you," he breathes out.

"Rowan got most of your looks," Allison says with a soft smile. "It's only fair Martha gets mine."

Years later, long after Rowan is a DNA analyst and Martha is a Pediatrician, Robert falls seriously ill. They are well into their sixties now, but to him, Allison is as gorgeous as ever. When he voices his thoughts, she smiles at him fondly—so much like she had when they had first met. "Ever the hopeless romantic, Robert."

"It's why you love me, isn't it?"

The following morning, the nurses tell Allison her husband is gone. There is a reluctance in each of their voices when they explain to her that he passed some time during the evening—peacefully, in his sleep.

But it's not true, because Robert is waiting for her in her dreams when she falls asleep that night, looking so much like the young and handsome blonde who had stolen her heart with a single glance at the tender age of eighteen. Allison, feeling more youthful than she has in years, runs to him, practically leaping into his arms. She thinks she can stay here forever.

(She doesn't wake up.)

**viii.**

There are so many other lives where they live happily ever after, together.

_Chance just screwed them over in this one._


End file.
